Mektoub, my love: canto uno

 If you're ready to sit through 180 minutes of a multitude of characters - most of whom are hard to distinguish from one another -, endless banal gab reminiscent of the worst Eric Rohmer talkies, a drawn-out voyeuristic sex scene right at the beginning, an equally drawn-out sheep birth scene towards the end and never-ending bar, beach and restaurant scenes in between, then I would definitely recommend this French/Italian movie by Abdellatif Kechiche.

Refers to the movie Mektoub, My Love: Canto Uno from 2017, which for incomprehensible reasons won two awards at the 2017 Venice International Film Festival. After watching the film, I was so puzzled why it was ever made that I read synopses and articles about it on the Internet and wondered whether they were about the same movie or whether these articles were copied from something someone had written without seeing it.

The supersonic haiku

The TV talks, the radio 
talks, the people talk, the
pizza would if it could.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2019)

Note
Based on a real pizzeria/bar experience. I decided to call this “supersonic” because the atmosphere created by the competing sound sources was definitely more than just sonic.

A bead of Chinese wisdom

“You never hear lambs complain about sheep’s milk.”

Note
I’m not sure what exactly the significance of this bead of Chinese wisdom is even though it is entirely true.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2019)

The eventful afternoon haiku

Fell asleep watching
Sherlock Holmes’ private life – not
a single thing missed

– Leonard Blumfled (© 2019)

Note
Razor edge of time reporting from the real life front. The movie (The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes, 1970), even though directed by Billy Wilder, who has made great films, is only worth a few yawns ... or sleeping through part of it.

The new person heard about today haiku

Nicaraguan
named Scarlet now living in 
Miami. Good bye!

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2019)

Note
One of those truth and nothing but razor edge of time poems. Probably just as significant as the red wheelbarrow.

First December 31st Haiku

It’s cleaning day, can’t
hear a thing but vacuum
cleaner howl.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2018)

Note
Named this “First December 31st Haiku”. Surely there’s going to be something more important today than meditating on an obnoxious vacuum cleaner. It’s a bagless one from AEG, which works fine except for the you know what. On that note: Happy New Year!

Spinning Man (2018)

A "thriller" that leaves you hanging rather than spinning, wondering what might have happened between the various gaps in storytelling ... some weird psychological / philosophical game between cop (Pierce Brosnan, has done better) and suspect (Guy Pearce, meandering between lost and nasty and utterly unconvincing as a professor his young students are supposed to lust after) ... all about the truth we somehow never get to know in a satisfactory manner in this time waster.

Refers to Spinning Man (2018), directed by Simon Kaijser and starring Pierce Brosnan, Guy Pearce and Minnie Driver. 

The Instagram pout haiku

Brought to her knees by
her own beauty and that pout
as she shoots herself

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2018)

Note
View Instagram for zillions of examples.

What the horoscope said

Realize that you will never get any further than the rut you're in until you take a deep breath, aim high, and shoot for your dreams.

Note
DNGOMOM - did not grow on my own manure. Sweet note from the daily horoscope for capricorn. I love the aiming & shooting part. Is the deep breath really necessary, though?

The honest dog haiku

Never liked ‘em much – 
their barking, their shitting, their 
police behavior.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2018)

Notes
A poem inspired by crass reality.
Every morning there are a few new piles on the sidewalk for you to step in.
One beast is an incessant shrill yelper his owners love to inflict on everyone in the neighborhood by putting him on the balcony for hours.
And then there are the public parks that have basically become dog parks where the curs run at you barking and snarling from every direction and where their owners, if they can be bothered, assure you sweetly that they’re puppies (how’s that for a hundred pounds of aggressive snarl sprinting towards you?) who are just playing.
And last but not least there are those owners who think it's a great idea to take the poor creatures for walks in shopping malls, where they can either be frightened to be stepped on or bark at other dogs they meet.
It’s a dog’s life!