Happy happy felicity

The Linguasso Text Collage generator is alive and well! It generated this collage for me and made me chuckle heartily. Try it out for yourself ...

A mostly stolen haiku

In the box
nothing
laughing

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
What happened here is that I read someone’s haiku, which had something (some object I can’t recall) in place of the nothing and seemed quite flat. So, to pep things up a bit and introduce some leaping* element, I used nothing instead. Try to imagine nothing laughing. What would that laughter look like/sound like? Nothing has no face, no voice. Quite apart from the fact that this haiku is seriously underfilled by common syllabic standards.

* Cf. Robert Bly, Leaping Poetry

The Hateful Eight

(One-line movie quickshots)

A lengthy exercise in Tarantinoism - no need to waste your time on that one.

- Leonard Blumfeld

Note
This quickshot refers to the 2015 film The Hateful Eight, directed by Quentin Tarantino and starring Samuel L. Jackson, Kurt Russell and Jennifer Jason Leigh and others. Go ahead and watch if you get off on cruelty, gore, etc.

A cough next door at 1 p.m.

(Another truthful haiku)

She must be rising
after last night’s 4 o’clock
boyfriend shouting match

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
Nothing but the truth reported here. The dear neighbor girl came home with her latest sweetheart around 11 last night, exposed the entire neighborhood to rumba zumba music for an hour and later proceeded to have it out publicly with the guy down below between 4 and 5 in the morning.

A Sunday morning haiku

Woken up by the
bark of a dog named Leila
passing by below.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
Of course I wouldn’t have known the dog’s name if her master hadn’t said it as he was trying to calm her down. Rome, January 29, 2017, 9:22 a.m.

The rhymed morning note haiku

Darling, I’m going
very far – I’m on my way
to the coffee bar.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
Completely authentic. Conceived in my head en tour to that said establishment.

The what does that bode for Rome haiku

January 2, 2017

Productivity:
piles of fresh dogshit along
the sidewalks today

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
Sad to say, the first poem this year starts on a disgusting note. However, the scats were too numerous and strategically placed to go unnoticed. Oh well.

The Nike haiku

Little goddess in
a niche. Modest and helpful.
Shines a timid smile.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2016)

Note
Does not refer to the omnipresent manufacturer of sports items but to the much, much older Greek goddess of victory whose name appears to have been appropriated by that same manufacturer in hopes of assuring victory to the wearers of its shoes.
I actually wrote this little poem in January of 2016 and stumbled across it today when I opened the art sketchbook in which I'd written it in pencil. I suspect that it was inspired by the picture of a statue of Nike but did not write down any details.

The Netflix haiku

Pick a movie – watch –
loading – watch some more – loading –
stopped – OK – was that it?

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2016)

Note
A reality haiku about trying to watch various movies on Netflix. I hope other people have better connections and get to watch entire films.

Love at first sight or breath or whatever

“You are so bouncily vapid!” she said breathily in that vapid girl band way.

I took it as a compliment and sort of nodded, not knowing what else to do.

“Let’s adjoin this, shall we?”

“OK.”

Upon which she took me by the hand and to the adjoining room. Bouncy on her bright red toenails.

(Where {...} happened – as it was all vapid bouncy imagination.)

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2016)

Note
Hardly requires any explanation, does it? 3WW supplied the words vapid, adjoining and bouncy, and I vapidly bounced on them to adjoin them.