The limited appeal horoscope

This was in the mail this morning:

Today, being slightly more aggressive than usual would heighten your appeal, which is limited by Neptunian fog.

I'll try, I'll try! I am worried about my appeal.

(But could anyone explain to me what Neptunian fog is and why Neptune has it out for me?)

– Leonard Blumfeld

Happens to include the words aggressive, heighten and limited, which were demanded by 3WW today.

The Let Them Eat Cake Variant Haiku

Grass cake, grass pudding,
grass soup, grass dumplings in grass
sauce should fatten you.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2013)

Written on the theme of grass at Haiku Heights.

Alludes to the quote ‘Let them eat cake’ misattributed to Marie Antoinette, queen of France, beheaded in 1793, and a satirical film about the Ceausescu regime of Romania, in which the dictator’s wife recommended grass as a solution for the starving Romanians.

The lifetime achievement haiku

Pointed hats, pointed
people in undershirts and
different attire.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2013)

First haiku in the artists haiku series.

Tarot and horoscope today

Tarot says:

Your emotional situation isn't that great today. With the Hanged Man and the High Priestess there's precious little chance of you spreading your wings. You're feeling rather discouraged and apathetic about work and towards those close to you, or towards your partner if you have one. Don't let it get you down - the sun's bound to shine tomorrow! At work, you may feel that your abilities are not being fully appreciated. Despite the obvious talents lavished upon you by the Empress, the Hanged Man is about to sow the seeds of doubt in the admiration of your colleagues or your friends. You'll do everything right and then you'll be criticized for doing a bad job! The image people have of you today will be enough to drive you crazy!

 Horoscope says:

You could feel lighthearted and a bit silly. Your sense of humor will be stimulated. People don't always realize that you are a kid at heart! You might spend some time cracking funny jokes. Or you could have fun sending some silly e-mails to your friends. You'll be entertained by TV or movie comedies. You might even come up with a comedy routine of your own. Celebrate the laughter in your life. 

Theoretically, if there was some universal truth to tarot and horoscope, these two should have something in common for the same person on the same day.

So – what to make of this?
a. The two do not seem to have a common denominator.
b. Thank God I don't have to work today, so will hopefully do without the seeds of doubt in my colleagues and my poor image.
c. In view of b., I'll skip the silly e-mails to my friends suggested by the horoscope.
d. Pretty poor universal/celestial/spiritual showing from whoever did tarot/horoscope.

The den haiku

The lion’s den – used
to be the dragon’s lair – what
awful putrid strench!

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2013)

Written for Haiku Heights and den.

Note
More than anything, this one plays with fixed expressions and treats them literally.

The black haiku

I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
– The Rolling Stones, Paint It Black

You said, paint it black,
so I did. Now everyone
calls me negative.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2013)

Written for Haiku Heights and black.

Note
Goes to show that you should not always listen to what people say.

The myth haiku

Myth is alive, myth
is afoot, myth never died.
Naked myth does thrive.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2013)

Instigated by Haiku Heights and myth, with a huge dose of inspiration from the Leonard Cohen/Buffy Sainte-Marie song God is Alive, Magic is Afoot.

Notes
Myth is rampant in this oh so scientific age. For example, the myth that we should get a new cell phone at least once a year in order to always stay connected in the latest ways, to keep up with the Joneses and to fill the pockets of Tim Cook and other CEOs. Or the myth that freedom can coexist with the NSA spying on everyone and everything in the whole wide world. Etc.

Proverbs from the Chinese XIII

Easygoing handsome facts are in the air for you today.

This was today's original Chinese horoscope.
Can't wait to be faced with these easygoing handsome facts!
(It's usually the hard and ugly facts that cause you pain.)
As to their carrier – the air –, it is cool and breezy today – full of the promise of those pleasant facts ...

– Leonard "Loves Facts" Blumfeld (© 2013)

Posted for 3WW (easygoing –  handscome – fact).

The butter haiku

You sweet and creamy
thing! How you get slandered as
saturated fat!

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2013)

Written for Haiku Heights and butter.

Notes
No comment needed for this one.

The chirpy haiku

Be chirpy, show this
rotten day some teeth, smile, go
beyond yourself, chirp!

Written for Haiku Heights and chirp.

Note
Written not because today is a rotten day, but just in case.
It's always good to have that kind of encouragement – good for pulling oneself out of the dumps.
Especially for writers. Go ahead: chirp, twitter, tweet or write!

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2013)